The Great Retard
TGC Exclusive: our favorite Bond villain spills his guts.

The Good Citizen is honored to publish this 3-part guest post by World Economic Forum founder and President Klaus Schwab. I’ve invited him to respond to my criticisms of him and his organization and express his views openly and even personally so the world might have a better idea about Klaus Schwab the man.
His work is dated from February because it took a month to compose and another two months to go through vetting by his army of lawyers. After reviewing his submission I found it best to read it in my head phonetically, exactly as I would imagine the sound of his Z-heavy slurring Germanic accent.
Part 1: From Retard to Bruiser
by, Klaus Schwab
4, February 2022
When the Good Citizen invited me to author a piece about myself I was very apprehensive. Usually, I have a team of researchers and writers preparing written works that have my name attached. They are often highly skilled in their respective fields of behavioral psychology, biotechnology, business entrepreneurship, communication, and my personal favorite, eugenics.
I accepted Mr. Citizen’s invitation on the terms laid out by my team of personal advocate representatives specializing in contract law at Meyer, Schwartz, Rubenstein & Goldfarb of New York Metropolitan City who worked in collaboration with my Avocats personnel of the Genevan firm Lavigne, Toussaint, Deja Vu, Chanel, Garnier, et De Rigueur.
The terms of my request as formulated by my team of representatives to Mr. Citizen was simply that he must publish my words unedited and as he receives them from my representatives. In exchange, I would agree to his request to be one hundred percent open and honest about myself, my background, and my intentions and submit a written work that was composed entirely with my own hand. I intend to make here my best effort to satisfy the terms of our agreement and set my reputation straight for Mr. Citizen’s readers who no doubt hold a very misguided view of me.